It Burns Like Hunger
by ImSoAwesome
Summary: Jaune always wanted to be strong,- living life as a weakling and a fool, he was sick of it. He was tired of all the bullies that pushed him around and told him he was nothing. He hated the looks of pity his friends gave him - no one believed in him. Not really. But he'd show them. He'd show them all...
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1:** Anguish

* * *

"And that's the match."

Her words were final, confirming the expected outcome.

Hair disheveled, sweat creasing off the brow it concealed – he swallowed the collection of saliva in his jaw, its moist warmth barely consoling his throat. He might have even choked on it, not thinking half as long enough to realize that he tried to swallow at the very same time he released a held breath. Above him, the monitor was as unbiased a verdict as the instructor – one screen with a bar filled with green, and the other but a sliver of blinking red.

An outcome not unusual… for Jaune Arc.

He struggled to stand, his legs wobbling from over exertion – eventually falling to one knee with his weapons held loosely. His opponent however, showed no sign of exhaustion – retracting his weapon and returning to his seat without a single word. Hard to say whether he was a good sport or not, he didn't say much during the match – at the very least he didn't feel the need to express his superiority like a certain Winchester.

But Jaune didn't miss that empty look he gave him before the match, one that lacked worry, hesitance… and respect.

Was the blonde to expect anything other?

"That, students, is a perfectly good example of why mastery of one's weapon is crucial," His equally blonde superior addressed the class, looking up at the stands with that respect -commanding gaze, "It must be treated as an extension of oneself, to know instinctively what your weapons can do, when to use them, when not to use them, and most importantly: how to use them _effectively_."

Jaune dared not meet her gaze, knowing all he'd see there was what he saw every time. Disappointment.

"Mister Arc, your fighting style was… unorthodox, but it does not lack the potential for refinement – be sure to keep practicing, it is the tried and true method of improvement after all. I would suggest using your sword more – it is hardly a helpful weapon if you don't attack your opponent."

"… yes ma'am." He whispered.

Goodwitch said what she always did, that he had to train harder, employ better usage of his weapons, manage his stamina and aura levels… things he'd grown to tune out near automatically. It was quaint now; boring, and while her input was valuable as a Huntress, the day-to-day routine of her advice for his losses only served to numb his brain to it.

He wondered if she ever heard the snickers in the stands…

The knight made his way back to his seat, ignoring any pointed whispers and subtle mentions of his name among the crowd. He'd have loved to call them out, to put them into the spotlight and see what more they had to say. To embarrass them, and to show them what it felt like to be humiliated.

But he couldn't, because he didn't have the means, and he shouldn't, because it would only make him as bad as they were...

And he wouldn't… because he was too afraid.

His friends awaited him, a usual sight, one that grew just as stale as Goodwitch's after-failure advice. Looks of pity, the attempts to keep them hidden behind a veil of optimism – a normalcy, really; the better natured portion of his group were just that predictable.

It wasn't that he didn't appreciate it - he did, but only in the sense that they were doing so to lift his spirits.

And maybe it worked the first few times; he would fail, and they would pick him back up. He'd look up, imagine the glory of his old man, then tell himself to try harder the next time around. It had always been enough, pushing him to ignore the sneers of the other students and to focus on the dream laid before him.

That was a time long since over… he didn't feel that motivation, not anymore.

But could he actually say that to them? No. Maybe it was due to the guilt, of not wanting to hurt the feelings of those whose intentions were hardly malign – their purpose was still good, even if they didn't know the outcome wasn't. Maybe it was because of the ache in his muscles, the strain from throwing forth his best work in the arena had tired him out too much.

Or maybe doing so would just be pointless.

So what should he do, let them repeat their usual attempts to bring back a happier Jaune? He surely would, because if he tried to shut them down, then it wouldn't end well for any of them. What he was approaching was just another battle he was going to lose.

This one he didn't mind so much though - he was as much their friend as they were to him.

 _And the mask of good nature slips back on._

It felt awful, giving them that pearly smile they'd all seen a million and one times – knowing that it did not truly reflect his feelings. He moved past Blake and Weiss, expecting and receiving nothing, but he found himself silently thankful for it. Yang settled for a pat on the shoulder – though not sure what to make of it, he was at least glad she didn't say anything.

Ruby was the first to approach him, babbling in her nervous attempt to mitigate his loss – oh what's that Ruby? He lasted a whole eight seconds longer than usual? You have given a broken man wings, truly. He didn't exactly blame her for this naivety; all she wanted to do was cheer him up, to spit on that would be insensitive.

He thought back to something Ruby said once before on the first airship to Beacon grounds, having overheard her while attempting not to upchuck that morning's breakfast. It was about how she didn't want to be special, how being extraordinary was the last thing she was after. She wanted a casual Huntress life, to walk the same road as all others but never step from the crowd and into the spotlight.

Normal. That's what she wanted.

Jaune wanted to be the furthest thing from it; he _did_ want to be special, he did want to be extraordinary! Yet he gave her that smile, and he playfully caught her head in one arm and ran his knuckles through her hair. Why it bothered him so that Ruby sought a life a normalcy in a field that completely abashed the mere concept was beyond his understanding… and more than a waste of time to try and figure out.

Nora encouragingly latched onto his back, hugging him tight as her voice threatened to murder his eardrums. "Well, you didn't die! I'd say that's an accomplishment, glorious leader!"

"Glorious leader… yeah…"

This brief time in Beacon's walls had been more than enough of an indication of just how wrong that decision had been. Him, of all people? Some would have considered it a gift – an acknowledgement from the Headmaster himself that their skills were worthy enough to lead a full team of Huntsmen.

No, it was nothing but bullshit.

Pyrrha was the best qualified, it was obvious to everyone. Strong, intelligent, capable – she was the Mistral Tournament Regional Champion, and a rising legend in the Huntsman community. Ren was smart, patient, and analytical – surely a man of his degree would be able to lead a team, Jaune would candidly follow him. Hell, he would gladly accept even Nora as leader! As zany as she was, you didn't become a Huntress by just swinging a hammer.

But him? Jaune Arc?

He was nothing.

Pyrrha was the last, and always the most… challenging. His partner, the one that was supposed to understand him… and yet she coddled him like a child. 'Do your best', 'You'll win next time', it was suffocating. And as he got closer to her looks of concern, he did his best to not allow his fingers to coil into his palm.

A look that he couldn't stand. One that told him she would forever encourage him to pursue his dreams… but likely knew damn well he'd never achieve them, not anytime soon anyway. He knew the truth, and these friends of his knew it too. But they would never tell him… such was the unfortunate end of being a friend.

Support above honesty.

Never mind that it made him feel like his heart had been shoved through a meat grinder.

"That was good Jaune," She said consolingly, placing a hand on his shoulder as he sat down, "Remember, don't be concerned so much about losing… it is –

"A better teacher than winning, yeah, I got it." The blonde robotically repeated, waving one hand airily as if to dismiss it. For a moment he thought he might have even replicated Pyrrha's voice, she said it so much. Hopefully, she missed the slight ire in his voice – like seriously, did she think he was dumb or something? She'd only said that, like, eleven times, and he'd already established himself as the biggest doofus on campus. That flame needed no more fuel.

He wondered if she thought those words held ground from someone of her standing. She was a shining example of victory and success, of a person who did not understand failure because she likely never experienced it. Sure, she'd probably had her share of losses, but she became famous from toppling even greater opponents! The girl was a winner, through and through.

His partner's words were shallow at best.

Even so, he couldn't allow her that crestfallen look she was giving him, if only to spare himself any guilt.

"Ah, it's okay…" Jaune rubbed the back of his head, a big beam on his face as he regarded her, "I'm not there yet… but I will be one day, I just have to keep training. I'm not going to give up just because of a string of losses, you know?"

She brightened immediately, and Jaune wished he could sigh. It was amazing how simple it was… to lie, to tell her that he was completely fine when he wasn't. When did it become so easy to hide behind this cover of security? To manipulate the good intentions of those around him just to avoid the pride wounding concern they sent his way? He wished they would see that… see how much their words hurt more than helped.

Cardin's insults were an easier endeavor; at the very least, he was honest about what he thought.

"I'm glad to see you haven't given up Jaune," Pyrrha nodded happily, smile stretching from cheek to cheek, "You will become a talented Huntsman yet, I know you will."

Her words felt nice, but that was all they were good for. Like sweet, sweet candy – good at first, but bad for you in the long run. The difference between their encouragement and his failures was a strangely even ratio, and yet it continued to feel like he was standing at the base of a downhill mudslide - unable to move up.

Twenty-eight full days behind the walls of Beacon Academy… and not a single bit of improvement. Truly living the dream.

"Thanks Pyr. That means a lot." He tacked on another smile for good measure, relieved when she smiled back and returned her attention to the teacher.

The class went by quickly, as it always did after Jaune finished his fight. He was sure to watch the additional matches, though he wasn't given them much attention this time. Like an old drunkard, reclining in his chair as the television blared on max volume. But he slogged on through it, present for the whole show, but never watching it. The knight congratulated his more excitable friends on their victories and waited impatiently for the bell to ring.

Thank god it didn't take very long.

The students were shuffling out, and Jaune was sure to be the last one to get from his seat. He was thankful Pyrrha had gotten distracted by a sudden conversation with Yang and Nora, allowing him to stay sitting as the others passed him by. Bodies bumped, conversations faded into murmurs, Jaune cared for none of it.

Blue eyes watched as the students got further and further away, any familiar faces gone in the mass.

Then, a sigh.

The momentary quiet was nice, though he knew he'd have to leave before Goodwitch saw him. But for that tiny moment, he just sat there – fingers interlocked as his eyes cast over the arena.

How many did today make it?

Twelve? Maybe thirteen? His luck then that not everyone fought on the same day – they were spaced out equally, and there were probably only three to four matches per class, depending on how long they were.

He liked to think he wasn't the only one who could never win, but then he'd lying to himself. Or had he been doing that already? To strut into this school with such brash confidence, daring to think that he was equal with everyone… how stupid.

What an idiot he had been.

What an idiot he still was.

"Mister Arc."

His gaze switched over to his right, catching the hem of Goodwitch's skirt. Knowing the consequence of a lingering gaze, he followed it up to her stern expression. "Class is over; you are free to leave."

 _Translated: Get out._

"Uh, s-sorry ma'am," He jumped to his feet right away, eyes moving to the floor, "I'll do that."

And he made to do so, one foot in front of the other as he listened to the scuff of his shoes. Looking over his shoulder showed him nothing different, Goodwitch simply closing the stadium for the day.

An ocean of students before him, Jaune already began to dread the rest of the afternoon. He was supposed meet up with Pyrrha and everyone else – they'd all agreed on a huge study session in the library a few days ago.

His partner would be disappointed… but there was a lot of that going on these days, wasn't there?

He'd have to apologize for it later, but right now he couldn't find it within himself to care. He just needed to be by himself, to think if for nothing else. He didn't want to see them all right now, not when he dragged his feet and hung his head so low. So instead he went off his own way…

The library in Vale would do until nightfall.

* * *

 _ **~It Burns, Like Hunger~**_

* * *

Back again.

As he was every night.

The arena was always off-limits after school hours – that's why the various training rooms in separate areas of the school were available twenty-four seven. But Jaune didn't favor those, as the chance of someone else showing up or hearing him was too great. Everyone already saw how awful he was during combat class every day… he'd prefer they not see him after hours.

He liked it here, it was a good place to be alone. And to train.

His right hand tightened around the grip of the Crocea Mors, swinging down and up lazily as the feeling of extension came to him. The weight of the blade, the sharpness of the edge, the tightness of the handle, he focused on it all.

Even if the feeling, the knowledge that holding it was wrong, came to the fore of his mind.

It was quiet around him, the lights cascading around to show him that the entire space was his. There were no others, just him in this little utopia, where he could be Jaune and work himself into the dirt, where he belonged. As he did every night previous.

And so, he began.

A hard horizontal, offset by his lack of remembrance to hold his foot down. And again, this time with less strength but more stability. He had to find a balance between his swing and his poise – the combination of both would give him the kind of swing necessary to lop off the head of an Ursa. Again and again, Jaune practiced this motion, each swing driving the memory of these movements into his brain.

He switched it up, holding his sword at his side while raising his shield up with the other arm. And when he pulled back, he allowed his imagination to shape the enemy…

The claw of a huge Beowolf swung down on him. Ren and Nora were injured behind him, only he could protect them.

A quick block.

No, not quick enough.

The strike would surely break him – the shield would have to be in the path of claw before it came, and if he didn't tighten his core just a moment before it hit, the shield would do nothing to protect him. Instead, the Beowolf's worn claws would tear through his neck and chest, dragging and tearing apart clothing and flesh – blood made to gush and spill onto the grass.

He, just barely alive enough to watch Ren and Nora be torn to shreds.

Then he would die a meaningless death. No honor, no victory… just cold and unforgiving death.

He drilled each move, old and new, not truly knowing if they were legitimate moves of master swordsman but doing so anyway. Vertical slashes to cut through the front, downward stabs to finish off downed opponents, smashing into enemies with the shield, rolling and flipping to evade attacks most lethal. The smell of his own body creeped into his nose, he ditched his jacket and felt the moist sweat all over him. Yet he didn't stop. He drilled it all again and again, even as time slipped away from him and his eyelids began to flutter, Jaune continued to train.

He trained, and trained, and trained, and trained…

Just as he did every night.

So… why did he still fail?

The exhaustion finally took over, and he found himself stopping to heave in buckets of air. His breaths echoed, bouncing off the walls and into the distance, though too far and too weak to disturb anyone. All he knew was the itch in his throat, the soreness in his flesh…

And the throb in his chest.

His knees hit the ground, signals of pain shooting through bone as he clenched his teeth together. His sword and shield fell to the floor - weapons he'd simply taken from his family, never his right to wield. And Jaune simply knelt there in silence, head hung as low as it had been earlier.

He was a failure.

He tried, he tried so hard… harder than anyone else. Day in and day out, he trained with diligence and heart … but it seemed like it was all for nothing. The motions of battle did not sync with him as they should have – his legs still wobbled in fear, and that fear unsettled his will. He was playing a fool's game; caught in a trap that was made so he could continue to fight, but never win.

Was this his destiny?

Forever to fail at the one thing he'd so adamantly pursued? All he'd ever wanted to be was a Huntsman! Ever since his father told him of the greatness of the Arc family, and how powerful their lineage was. He wanted to follow in the footsteps of his father and grandfather and become a Huntsman that they could be proud of.

Every generation of Arc had given way to a new line of warriors, growing more powerful as time went on. Jaune wanted to be the one to continue that line.

So why? Why was he cursed to forever be this… this… loser!

He hated it. Oh, how he _hated_ it.

Everyone else got to be strong, everyone else got to be talented! His sisters, Ruby and her team, even Cardin and his stupid lackeys! They all had these amazing powers and abilities that he didn't! It was so unfair; why couldn't he have skills like that? They all paraded around, like everything they could do was completely normal, achievable by anyone who put their mind to it.

Except for him.

It was no surprise to him that rumors went around – snickers about how the amazing Pyrrha Nikos had gotten stuck with some scrawny blonde idiot that had no talent. He'd heard people say such things, about how he was akin to a chain weight, keeping her and their team held down and halting their progress. Some people even theorized that he was a counterbalance to Pyrrha's incredible skill, so that their team was more on par with the rest.

A handicap.

It may as well have been true. Team training couldn't even be done properly because of his weaknesses, never able to offer anything other than a plan of action. Oh sure, they assured him his plans were solid and it was more than enough of a contribution…

But Jaune would never buy into that.

Weakling, failure, loser… he was so used to such words; he'd experienced it all his life. And yet when he tried to change it, when he tried to make a difference, nothing happened. Instead, he remained at the feet of those better than him. Be it intelligence, strength, skills, or capability overall, it didn't matter.

His hand swept over his sw - no, his father's sword, tightly gripping the handle.

Before tossing it away with all his strength.

"Graaah!"

He didn't know when he reached a wall, nor did he pay attention to the violent yells he released in-between frantic breaths. His knuckles cracked and screeched in protest, begging their owner to stop… but he wouldn't.

Tiny splotches of red stained the wall, the tears in his knuckles opening wider and wider with each successful impact. His aura did its job, shielding him from pain… but he'd exhausted most of it already. It wouldn't protect him for much longer, nor did he want it to. Soon the aura gave way, hard bone underneath the skin fracturing chip by chip – like a hammer against ice.

And like fire, the pain seared through both hands – a burning sensation that crawled into his fists and threatened to overtake them. The wall met his assault head on, at the same time, it's thick body shrugging off the heated bellows.

Still, he didn't stop.

"GRAAAAH!"

His head was next, his forehead smashing into the solid surface sending a splitting pain into his skull. He screamed as loud as he could, so as to ignore the line of blood that dribbled down his forehead, streaking down his eye.

Right beside the tears.

The world span and warped, Jaune falling onto his knees again as those same fists pounded into the floor. The hard material laughed at his pointless efforts, enraging him even more. Even the lights, even the empty stands above the arena – they all mocked him, and never felt the need to fight back.

Jaune screamed, and screamed, and screamed even more – one fist weakly beating on the floor. There were so many answers he wished he had, so many changes he wanted to make. But he'd never get them, he wasn't strong enough to just take those answers for himself. He was weak, unimportant… his presence here in this academy was based purely on tolerance.

If only… if only he was stronger.

If only he had the power of Yang, or the swiftness of Ruby, or Pyrrha's natural talent… maybe then he could make a difference. Maybe he could be freed of this pathetic life he'd led – of allowing his fears to control him, of allowing the bullies to step all over him, to allow those who claimed to be his friends to look at him with such soul crushing pity.

He'd show them – all those who'd put him down, laughed at him, told him he could never do it. If he had the power, he would show them that they were wrong. Smirk down at them as he rose above, reaching heights that no one else ever had.

If only…

His brain felt like it was pulsating in his head, threatening to burst out of the protection of his head. His fingers scratched against the floor, nails desperately trying to dig into the solid ground.

And that was where he sat, any sounds he made never got through the walls of the arena, all while he cursed the world, the school, the people…

And himself.

* * *

 **B/N:** Spooky again! I'm honestly not sure why ISA puts up with me at this point; I'm such a snide, overbearing brat. Oh well, I guess there's no accounting for taste. So, there seems to be a lot of Jaune hero-worship on this site, but we all seem to forget a couple of Jaune's major flaws: he's prideful, he's untrusting, and he's a liar. I mean, hey: I like Jaune too. Best guy. I write harem stories with the best of them. But he's far from perfect, which is part of why I find him so compelling to write. He's a stupid teenage kid with honor issues and an inferiority complex.

* * *

 **Hello everyone, ISA here with the re-upload/rewrite of It Burns Like Hunger.**

 **For those who haven't read it before, t** **his will be a** **fall from grace** **kind of journey – telling how Jaune slowly loses control of himself, becoming angrier, more violent… and eventually driving himself to insanity. Jaune and his goal to become a Huntsman have the potential to fall into this path, especially if canon had gone a little darker with his backstory and drive.**

 **So, I want this story to show the** **process** **of that budding obsession – how it affects him, those around him, and his overall future.**

 **I know some of Jaune's thoughts in the first scene might seem a little odd for him but** **note that the assumptions he draws about other people are not facts - this fic is all from his perspective so what you are seeing here is his insecurities, bitter feelings and perspective on what he has personally seen.**

 **Several changes have been made to this fic, some stuff has been taken out, new stuff will be added, but it still follows the original plotline.**

 **Also, yes, I know the quote in the beginning is Cinder's words, that was completely intentional. That single quote is what will define Jaune in this fic.**

 **And if there is one thing I like about RWBY. It's the parallels between Jaune and Cinder.**

 **Do you see the parallels I see? Let me know in a review!**

 **ISA**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2:** Obstinate

* * *

Lidded eyes.

The nights were always long, for him at least – but the days were even longer.

Slogging through daily classes as sleep tried to overtake him was a regular ordeal – a systematic one that he actively placed on himself to make the most out of his day. He wondered then why he wasn't used to it – perhaps because it was unhealthy to deprive his body of much needed rest.

 _Screw that… I'll have time to sleep when I'm dead._

His body would fight him though, but in an odd way he wanted it to. Conquering his body and mind was the best way to assume full control of it, and what better way to understand oneself than to dominate it?

"Despite his cabbage-like odor, my grandfather's tales of wisdom helped me shape my future. Peter, he once said…"

Gibberish and malarkey, two words Jaune never saw himself ever saying, but they fit his esteemed professor's stories like… something that could fit a man of his size.

On and on went these grand exploits; his gallant voice filling up every air molecule within the space of the classroom. It was a marvel how simple it was to ignore the man as he boisterously described every detail of his various conquests. Even more amazing that he never seemed to notice that no one was paying attention.

Would Jaune ever come to this class one day and actually learn something?

Well, he wasn't really complaining. It was a welcome start to the day, forty-five minutes of pretending to listen to a bunch of boring tales – gave him that much more time to himself. A bit of self-reflection, if you will. When the school day ended, he still had a hefty schedule waiting for him…

Studying for at least two hours – his least favorite activity, but intelligence worked in tandem with strength, and would play a key role in many of his future battles. He wasn't currently the strongest, nor the fastest… so for now, he'd have to push to become the smartest.

He'd probably skip dinner… again. Lunch always got him through, even if he did get hungry later in the night. But he figured it was good endurance training – tolerating how to defend himself on a lack of food could only be good for his survival skills.

The rest of his day would go normally, secluded training until curfew set in. Then it would be back at the arena later that evening to continue training all the way till early morning. Then return to the dorm and get in as much sleep as possible before the next classes began.

This was how he managed his time… and it worked for him, or at least it seemed to.

Of course, his teammates expressed concern, but he assured them he was fine, and that he wasn't putting too much strain on himself. He was lying of course, and they likely knew that as well. But they didn't understand, they could never understand.

He was the weakest, the frailest, the most useless of them all… so unless he pushed himself to the absolute limit day in and day out; unless he worked all the sweat, tears and blood out of his body, he would never stand alongside them as equals.

His body demanded sleep – eyelids doing their best to shut away the real world and enter the long-awaited dreamscape. But Jaune wouldn't allow it.

Training first. Sleep second.

All he needed was one major leap, something to propel him to a higher level than he was now. Once he got there, he could afford to slow down a bit more. He didn't know what it was or how it would happen, but his gut burned with vigor as if sensing its arrival was not far off.

That's what he needed… a leap. A bolster in progression that would take him to the next level.

But for now, he let his withering gaze move to the equally bored bodies in the class; not particularly paying attention to anyone, just idly scanning over the forms of his peers as he tried not to count down the little hand of the clock.

Then his gaze flicked down…

Just in time a catch a pair of silver eyes turning away from him from below.

She did that a lot.

It was odd, the tiny things he noticed about Ruby. She had a strange tendency to stare at him sometimes, which he supposed was probably just her form of showing concern. The little reaper was worse at hiding it than Pyrrha – did they honestly think they were being covert in their lingering stares?

He might have wondered why… but quickly realized he was much too exhausted and busy to care. If she didn't say anything, then he wouldn't either. It was no skin off his nose.

The bell rang before long, and Jaune was sure to lag behind the crowd to avoid Ruby's gaze. He wasn't exactly trying to avoid her – at least not in the context of doing so out of anger or spite. It wasn't her, it wasn't anyone really.

It was just easier to spend time alone these days, helped to keep him focused – outside of an hour of lunch together, he didn't bother dedicating more time to her or anyone else.

It'd be a waste of time; time better used for training.

He exited the door last, hand running through his hair as he headed down the hall through the sea of students.

He was already dreading combat class.

* * *

 **~It Burns, Like Hunger~**

* * *

Incessant chatter.

Jaune actually found it relaxing, so long as he couldn't understand what anyone was saying. A hundred conversations between a hundred students, overlapping so sporadically that no details could be discerned from them.

An ambiance to fill the gap. And at times a melody to compliment the mindless twirling of cold food on his tray.

"Jaune, are you okay?"

Of course, since he was among these students, it meant that he would be sitting just inches from a crowd of his own. Which unfortunately meant he could hear them when they spoke – a little conversation never hurt anyone, but it became an increasingly more annoying activity than it was supposed to.

He didn't expect Pyrrha or the others to know that though.

"Huh?" He pretended not to hear her, turning to her with a smile, "Of course, why?"

"You looked pretty out of it during classes today." Yang piped up, "Actually... you've been looking like that a lot."

Their concern was apparent, and this had only served to turn the attention of everyone else toward him as well. With the minor exception of Weiss, who at least tended to her own business.

"I have no clue what you mean. I feel fine, seriously." Jaune plastered the biggest smile he could, hoping that would be enough, puffing out his chest and pacing hands on his hips for emphasis, "Ow…"

Unfortunately, this aggravated the bruise on his side, which had yet to fully heal from today's sparring match. He had a certain Winchester to thank for that.

Damn Cardin and his painful ass mace.

Deep, arrogant laughs dared to invade his ears – he knew without needing to look but did so anyway.

Yup, Cardin Winchester in the flesh. Picking, yet again, on someone who he perceived as weak and helpless. A true man this one, practically boxing in Velvet Scarlatina with his teammates and taunting her all throughout the lunch hour.

Jaune felt his nails bite into his palms.

"Is it Cardin?" Jaune turned back to face her Pyrrha. So she noticed that, huh?

He thought he hid it well enough. But then again, Cardin loved to cause public embarrassment. Jaune supposed that was probably half the battle – inflict damage, cause a wound, then allow the masses to finish the job.

It was surprising how many people looked the other way.

"Cardin? What about him?"

Ruby's eyes narrowed. "He's picking on you."

Yes, he was. He was a bully, a scumbag and a stain upon mankind. But he was still strong, stronger than him.

But not for long.

Jaune would defeat him, he'd put him in his place and shame him as the bully had shamed many others. He'd rise from the ashes and pick up all those Cardin had knocked down with him; then he would see… then everyone would see.

"If you need help Jaune, you have us." Pyrrha said a bit more directly than Jaune expected. As though it wasn't so much as her offering her help, but instead begging him to let her help.

He might have appreciated it more if it didn't stone his pride to death, but he couldn't accept her help, not like this. No doubt it would solve the problem – his friends would rough Cardin up and he would never bother anyone else again, but what did that say about Jaune?

That he was weak, scared? Too much of a helpless little girl to fix his own problems? What kind of man would he be then?

He needed to fix this on his own – to keep any semblance of honor and self-respect that he had for himself, he had to defeat Cardin with his own two hands. He wanted his friends to see him become strong, for them to lose those looks of concern and pity and instead feel like he could protect them.

"It's really not as big a deal as you think. He's an asshole to everyone."

"Doesn't give him an excuse though," Yang spoke up, "That ass needs to be put in his place."

Jaune agreed whole-heartedly… and he'd be the one to do it.

"Jaune," Ruby leaned forward, "Are you sure you don't want our help?"

"Pff," Jaune flicked her forehead, causing the girl to yelp and cover her attacked forehead, "Come on Ruby, have a little more faith in me. I can take Cardin, no problem."

"Are you sure of that, Arc?"

Everyone looked to the speaker… and Jaune was hardly surprised to see that it was Weiss.

"Weiss…" Ruby said to her, trying to quiet her.

"What?" She shrugged, absent of remorse as she looked at Jaune, "I'm stating only the truth. Cardin may be a savage, but he's a far more competent fighter than you. You're bold to face him; but it's hardly worth the effort. He's beaten you every time you've fought. Your problem would be solved in an instant if you accepted some support."

Silence.

Jaune wasn't completely sure what to say… or rather, not sure what he was supposed to say as compared to what he wanted to say. With a light chuckle, he scratched the back of his head, a smile plastered on his face. "Oh, heh. Yeah, I uh… suppose you're right."

"Weiss didn't mean it like that," Ruby tried again, fumbling over her words for any means of cushioning Weiss's devastating blow, "I think – well maybe, it's like…"

The girl had no answer, that much was obvious. And it was clear that no one else did either.

And now here they were; in this moment of stagnant awkwardness that usually accompanied a lack of rebuttal. Ruby said nothing, Pyrrha said nothing – Jaune might have been happy with that if he wasn't in their direct line of sight.

The boy decided he'd had enough.

"Welp!" he said with a stamina he knew he didn't have, "I'm gonna head to class early – I'm stuffed."

"But you never touched your food…" Someone pointed out, but by then Jaune was already making his way out of the cafeteria.

He should've been angry at Weiss, perhaps it would've been justified. But it just wasn't within him to be when he knew she was right. All she did was tell him a truth that he refused to accept… or rather, one he used to not accept. He was sure everyone else agreed, it was only logical - as basic as doing math. Any one of them could beat Cardin into the dirt – his friends absolutely had the ability to protect him.

But they were wrong to think that they could change anything.

This wasn't the first time he'd dealt with someone like Cardin Winchester – just your garden variety attitude problem, indigenous to any and possible every educational facility on the planet. Cardin was arrogant, he'd chalk their victories up to luck, like he always did – he was sore loser like that.

But if Jaune beat him?

He wouldn't be able to convince the class that it was lucky. He'd beaten Jaune a million and one times, so everyone knew he was superior. But if Jaune kicked him off his proverbial throne, it would be undeniable proof that he was getting stronger.

If anything, Weiss's words propelled him to push harder – even more so as he looked back to see Cardin and his friends pulling at Velvet's ears.

 _I'll stop him one day Velvet, I promise._

Steeling his tired nerves, Jaune made his way to the next class – hoping the sanctity of solitude would find him again, however temporarily.

* * *

 **~It Burns, Like Hunger~**

* * *

He creaked the door open.

Another late night, but he was glad it was over.

The walk back, and the coldness of the night air helped to dry the sweat, although now all it did was leave him feeling disgustingly sticky. His muscles screamed throughout his body, aching in all the right ways – the pain was the perfect indicator of a good workout. He liked to think the burn in the nerves were his muscles progressively growing inch by inch.

They begged their owner to allow them rest, and Jaune let out a heavy breath in knowing that he would allow it. For there was more training to endure tomorrow… and the day after that, and the day after that.

A shower was tempting; it would certainly help him sleep better, but he figured he'd take a quick one ten minutes before class anyway, it would be better to just get as much sleep as he could right now. So the knight gingerly found his bed, pulling back his comforter as he looked over the sleeping forms of his teammates

Ren lying on one side, long hair hanging over the bedside. Nora sprawled like a messy plate of spaghetti between her sheets and comforter… a touch of drool dribbling off her eternally present smile. Pyrrha… llooking squarely at him.

 _Shit._

"May I ask where you were?" She said.

"Training – I've told you a million times, Pyr." He was sure to keep his voice down, if Nora woke up then no one would get back to sleep.

"This late? You were gone since the end of class. And now it's three in the morning…"

Jaune shrugged, plopping down onto his bed. "You make it sound strange. This is what I normally do."

"I… I know." Her hair fell off her shoulder as she propped up on her elbows, tired eyes averting from him before looking back, "I just think…"

"Think what?" Okay, that one slipped out. He wasn't really angry; but she asked him enough questions already. The last thing he wanted to come back to after training all night was a lecture. She flinched in response, eyes briefly sparkling from the beams of moonlight that peeked through the curtains.

"Jaune, you're working yourself too hard. I can understand dedication to your training, but this is becoming compulsively unhealthy. When was the last time you ate or slept properly?"

 _Doesn't matter._ He dared not say this to her though.

"Please Jaune…" Her legs scooted out from under the comforters, bare feet touching the floor as she sat upright. Not even tiredness stayed Jaune's gaze, catching himself glancing at her silky white nightgown that left considerable cleavage to the wandering eye. Her ivory skin glistened in the light just like her eyes did and the concern spread along her lovely face struck a guilty chord in his heart.

"I just worry for you." She spoke openly and honestly, which only made Jaune feel worse, "You assure me that you're alright… but how am I supposed to believe that when you look like you might collapse?"

"Pyrrha," He sat on his bed as he scratched his head, "I get that you're concerned, and I appreciate it, but I need you to trust that I know what I'm doing. I wouldn't be doing it if I wasn't sure. This is something I have to do – something I _need_ to do."

He sighed then, he was tired of explaining himself – yet another waste of time. He turned onto his bed after slipping off his shoes and jacket, turning to face the wall as he finished. "You don't have to believe it… you don't even have to like it. But I'm going to keep training, and you'll just have to deal with it."

And with that he pressed his head deeper into the pillow, closing his eyes and hoping the redhead wouldn't say anything more.

She didn't.

Good.

* * *

 **Not much more than a bit of setup in this chapter; I switched around some events a bit and put them where they could fit with this story. Mostly this chapter was to establish how Jaune trains, how often he does it, and what the others think about it.**

 **I do admit that first uploading this, I wasn't sure what to do. The last version was good but a bit edgy and had some parts in it that felt a bit cheesy, I cringe just thinking about it. So I will do my best to keep this as grounded as possible.**

 **Short chapter i know, but this was the best way for it to end oft. Next chapter is the one before a big moment so stay tuned!**

 **That said, I hope you enjoyed the chapter and I'll see you in the next one!**

 **IMSOAWESOME**


	3. Chapter 3

**This chapter is for a pal of mine named Voltegeist, who got my ass in gear to update this fic. As well as SpookyNoodle who beta'd the original, and Mike, the Remnant Paladin, the most avid fan of this work.**

 **Thank you all.**

* * *

 **Chapter 3:** Shatterpoint

* * *

Break day.

A day to relax, a day to reflect upon oneself and perhaps bog through a few timeless memories. It was that one day of the week to wind down – to catch up on much needed rest, perhaps even to think about things he had less time to ponder on.

And for him, it was a time to impatiently wait for one thousand four hundred forty minutes just to get back to his strict training regime.

But it had to be done; there was no use fighting it.

Water splashed his face; the cold swimming in his eyes and stirring the red out of them. His thin lashes blinked on repeat, shaking off the grogginess of a late weekend morning as the teen matted down his face with a towel.

Today would be a slow one, just like Sundays always were… at least for him. He couldn't train today – and that was probably the most frustrating part about it.

He wanted to constantly be training; he felt like each successful day brought him closer and closer to his ever-evasive goal. It kept him in a perpetual motion; one that wasn't too fast to keep up with, or too slow to become boring.

But he couldn't today. His workouts would be fruitless if he didn't give his body time to develop the new muscles – and that was a clear scientific fact. He'd be hurting his body more than strengthening it. It was but an intermediary; he'd be right back on the grind with a better developed body, if only slightly.

He looked at himself in the mirror… conceding himself a grin. He wasn't exactly happy with it; it would've been nice to have shapelier muscles. But they were still results, and that's what mattered; biceps and triceps were taking shape, the foundations of an athletic build. More robust pectorals, with the faintest trace of developing abs to complete a much tighter core. His legs much the same, feeling tight and strong as he rubbed his hand along them.

It looked nice, he'd give it that.

But it was nothing impressive; stellar compared to the frail, lanky blonde who yelped every time he stubbed his toe, but nothing that would wow anyone.

 _This'll work for now._ He accepted as he threw on his gray t-shirt and slipped back into the dorm room, taking a small pleasure in the fact that he was alone. Pyrrha and the others had already gone to enjoy their day, doing… whatever it is they did on Sundays.

A heavy breath passed through his lips, not so much tired as he was bored – which in turn made him even more tired. And so the endless loop began, in which Jaune found himself on his bed, staring at the crusted paint of the wall as he wrestled against the seduction of sleep.

 _I shouldn't just be laying here…_

So what was he to do then. Nap?

It honestly felt weird, being so still – while awake, anyway. He couldn't really afford the time to if he was to reach the same level as his peers; this was the routine, the pattern he'd repeat week after week in order to bolster a greater level of strength.

It was slow work, sure, but progress was progress.

Exercise was easy; lifting weights, endurance training, sprinting miles… he'd even gotten into learning basic martial arts, acrobatics and evasive maneuvers. It would've been nice to get some actual classes on the subjects, but if there was one other thing that he hated about himself, only slightly less than his cowardice and fragility…

Was that he was flat broke.

And he dared not ask anyone for money; it would be just as easy (and far more sparing on his pride) to get a job. But between his own training, classes, independent studying and self-imposed time with friends, there really wasn't any time for other obligations.

That was fine though… he'd gladly get a job as soon as Cardin was eating dirt.

He felt his stomach grumble, whining for a snack – the lazier part of him argued against it, having grown far too comfortable on the bed to want to move. Oh, who was he to obey, the Glutton or the Sloth? He couldn't decide, though he was leaning a bit more toward the latter, if only because he had yet to move.

Sloth: 1 Glutton: 0

Jaune ran a palm ran down his face, dragging down his bottom lip before allowing it to slip back into place. The blonde turned onto his back, meeting the same ancient paint that decorated the dorm ceiling.

He didn't tag along with Pyrrha and the others on purpose; knowing full well he wouldn't get the rest his body needed if he decided to spend the day with his team. They all knew the drill on days like this, and thankfully never bothered him on the one day he actually got optimum rest.

To them it was probably a relief; Jaune certainly didn't miss the stares they gave whenever they saw him near dead on his feet. Ren had approached him many times about it, and Jaune always assured him he was fine.

At least today they wouldn't have to worry about needing to catch him in case he fell asleep standing.

Instead he was here – lying in a room as silent as a Ren with strep throat, constantly shifting from side to back to stomach as the realization that only ten minutes had passed became clear. Maybe a nap would do him some good, it would certainly do well to make the clock move faster.

Jaune turned onto his stomach, burying his face into his pillow so as to lock himself into darkness. There, his mind swirled as the wait went on; images of various exercises, moves, techniques and skills he could very well be practicing providing a solid show to find siesta through.

And soon enough, he did.

* * *

 _ **~It Burns, Like Hunger~**_

* * *

A knock.

Many knocks actually, as if the perpetrator couldn't control himself. The knight's eyes eased open; not quite as groggy as he'd been before, but certainly enough to become instantly cranky. What heathen dared to interrupt him in the middle of a time of rest? Why when he got his hands on him, he'd…

"Hey, Jaune! You awake!?"

There could only be one person at his door with such a queerly high voice…

"Uhhh… yeah," Jaune mumbled as he got up, much to his body's displeasure. After opening the door, bue orbs and a scowl contrasted silver and a beam, "Need something, Ruby?"

The young Huntress looked as cheery and chipper as she always did, hands linked behind her back as she drew circles in the floor with her shoe. How this girl managed to be so adorable all the time, Jaune would never know.

"Well, no… I don't need anything," Ruby said cheekily, unaware of how close Jaune was to shutting the door and going back to bed. Really, she woke him up just to toy around with him? Her gaze lingered on him for only a second, turned away right after. The same happened again, almost an instinctive perpetual motion that would have went on for centuries had she not resumed speaking.

"~Soooo, Weiss and Yang are going shopping this afternoon…" She trailed off, gaze flicking up at him as if awaiting a response. What? Was she expecting tips on what clothes to wear?

 _How about more red? Because you clearly don't wear enough of that._

"And Blake needs some new books from a store downtown," She continued, "and Nora was like, 'What!? That's where my favorite game corner is! Come on Renny, let's go too!' Then Yang invited Pyrrha, who at first said no thank you, then Yang said 'Sorry I misspoke, you are going, P-money'. But Pyrrha said no again, so Yang put her in a headlock and –

Jaune decided it best to intervene, like now. "Ruby…"

"Yeah!?" Wow, she sounded a little too excited there…

"Please just… get to the point."

"Oh! Uh, right… yeah, the point, haha," Red tinted her already rosy cheeks, "Um… well, since everyone wants to go, and Pyrrha is being forced to go…" Oh, he knew where this was headed, "I su – I mean, Yang. Yeah, it was Yang that suggested that we should invite you too! I didn't really care either way. Heh, you know me… like riding solo and stuff…"

The girl couldn't be more obvious, but for the sake of a less agonizing migraine, he decided it best to act like he believed her.

"And that's when I said, 'Okay, I'll go ask him!' and then I walked here, and I got here and here I am…" She paused again, daring to actually look up at him a little longer this time, "So, do you want to –

"No."

She took a double-take, flinching as if she'd just been slapped. "What?"

"I said no," Jaune scratched his head, a deep frown having settled into a spoiled mood, finishing up abruptly as he readied to close the door, "You guys have fun though."

"W-wait!" Ruby's hand kept the door from moving further, "Are you sure?"

"Yes Ruby, I'm sure. Doesn't sound all that fun, I'd rather sleep in."

"Well it can be fun! You should see how funny Yang and Weiss are when they argue over the dresses, we got kicked out of the store one time because Yang punched the manager! I mean yeah it was because he grabbed her behind but in the end it was still really, really funny! Oh, and since Nora and Ren are going to the game corner, we can all go there too! So –

A single finger was placed on the reaper's lips, silencing her and the echoes her voice had generated. The owner, answered quite simply, "No."

He freed her mouth, the girl just staring at him before her gaze cast downward. "B-but… it would be fun; everyone wants you to come. It's not the same without you…"

Oh no, here it came.

"Please, Jaune?" She looked so desperate, so hopeful – the girl was always unfailingly earnest, and unfortunately that worked against him and many others who dared to disappoint Beacon's biggest sweetheart. It was hard to believe how odd she was around him now – she wasn't nearly as awkward before she started looking at him all googly-eyed.

But then again, he had turned into a slobbery mess the moment he decided to pursue Weiss. Biggest mistake of his life.

Not this time, though.

It wasn't that he couldn't go, he just didn't want to – despite his boredom, a night on the town did not sound very appealing despite his usual love for outdoor activities. He loved him some video games, and who the hell wouldn't enjoy a vicious cat fight between the Sun Dragon and the Ice Queen? And with Nora's wild antics in the mix, it was the perfect recipe for a night of chaotic debauchery.

But Jaune Arc had no patience for it.

It was a waste of time; and he'd begun telling himself that it would just distract him from his goal. He needed to remain focused, at all times even – training even when he couldn't move his body. Reviewing his techniques and skills in his head, thinking up new methods of practice, drilling valuable knowledge from his textbooks to ensure that his academic scores were top notch.

There was no room anything else.

He looked at the girl again, big silver eyes that threatened to well up should she be rejected spiked a wave of regret through him. It was comforting to think that she was doing it on purpose, even though he knew she wasn't.

It was what he wanted against what she wanted… and Jaune Arc had lost too much by being selfless all the time.

"Sorry Rubes, but it's still no." He said with finalization, straightening up his slouch as he did so to accentuate his point, "This my only day to relax, so I'm not gonna waste my time goofing around with you guys when I could just be doing what I want to do – you might have to settle for just pretending that I'm there."

The girl went without a response.

The hall was quiet – it usually was on the weekend, but this time it was eerily silent. No doubt due to just how uncomfortable the situation had become now that he had finalized an answer to his fellow leader.

Eventually her response came; though brief and low, a whisper almost. "Oh, right… okay…"

Her steps almost couldn't be heard as she walked away, the usual pep in her step now gone as the proverbial rain clouds made a home over her head. He couldn't but watch her as she left, with each successive step she took making him feel even worse the longer he watched.

Some part of him screamed to call out to her, to tell her to come back – but his judgement was better than that. This was the right choice; for both of them. All he'd do was drag down the party, he was in no mood to be playing games and the most he'd do was shrink into the background while everyone else enjoyed themselves.

It wouldn't make a difference whether he went or not. There was a soft click as he closed the door, pressing his back against it as two fingers massaged his forehead.

 _Great, now I feel like a complete jerk…_

He hated to see her so disappointed… she was his friend, right? Could he really not afford to spend time with her when she so adamantly asked for it? She'd looked so excited when she came up to ask him, no doubt feeling just like he did whenever he plucked up the courage to ask out her partner. Rejection was a cruel affair; even if all he had done was reject a night to hang out.

Though he hoped it would never come to anything further than that.

It was her bad luck to have caught him on a day where his mood was less than favorable – where the only thing he wanted to do was not available to him. He could reconsider…

No! No way was that happening.

As he said, it would be a complete waste of time – there was no need for him to go just to cheer her up. She was a big girl… for the most part. She'd shrug it off as soon as she was around the rest of the group. Maybe.

He sat down on his bed with dedication to his choice; crossing his arms as he defiantly pushed any thought of second-guessing himself out of his brain.

His decision was final; he was absolutely not going.

Nope. Not going. Not at all. No matter how much he envisioned the teary eyes of the young prodigy, they would not sway him. No matter her slumped form, or the look of pure elation that would appear on her face were he to show up. She'd get over it and be fine by tomorrow.

He, Jaune Arc, would most certainly not be going.

"…"

And he continued to tell himself this; repeating a million and one times in his head to solidify his rock solid decision… even as he grabbed his jacket from his desk and closest pair of shoes.

* * *

 _ **~It Burns, Like Hunger~**_

* * *

"Jaune!"

A blur of red and Jaune felt heavier than usual.

Ruby gripped him in the tightest hug she could manage; she probably would have knocked him over if he hadn't corrected his balance in time.

 _Thank you, training._ The blonde practically able to hear her goofy beam as her face crooked into his chest.

"I knew you'd come." She said confidently. No she didn't, but he smiled nonetheless, even if he desperately wanted to turn and run back to the dorm.

"Yeah, I guess the thought of playing Dragon Hunt again won me over. Sorry about earlier - I shouldn't have taken out my attitude on you."

"It's okay," Ruby's ear to ear smile, "I'm just happy you came. Come on, everybody is waiting!"

Well at least the girl was happy now; bounding toward the airship with him in hand.

Didn't take long for the others to recognize his presence; the hum of the ship not nearly enough to cover the noise such an exuberant crowd could generate. Up the ramp of the Bullhead they went, the little hooded hero practically preaching the good news to the passengers.

"Yo Vomit Boy!"

"Jauney!"

Did Ruby bring her scythe-rifle with her? He was no expert marksman, but he was certain he wouldn't miss if he just placed the barrel against his forehead…

Maybe it wouldn't be necessary to go that far yet; he'd come this far hadn't he? At the very least this night out would eat up a few hours; and everyone looked happy to see him so…

He joined up with them, Nora quickly being the first to give him a huge hug. Sheesh, she made it sound like she hadn't seen him in weeks… which may or may not have been true. Yang punched his arm, and thankfully didn't leave it dislocated, but otherwise seemed happy with his presence. Pyrrha looked pleased; hiding any elated joy with a graceful smile and nod to acknowledge him. Looking at them all left a weird pit in his stomach.

He had been kind of ditching them since the school year began.

He didn't really mean to, it just kind of happened. He had to take the time necessary in order to grow stronger, how could he do that if he was goofing off?

"Finally decided to give up the life of a shut-in?" Yang jeered, Jaune moving to sit beside his partner… which was oddly difficult for some reason. Like something was weighing him down… oh right, Ruby was still clinging to him.

"No, I just forgot that I ran out of conditioner – it's a total coincidence that I'm here right now." He wished he'd said it more directly, with more offense. But the safer play was to joke about it; it would make them happy, which would make him happy, and all would be right with the universe.

"Well, we're all happy you're here." Said Pyrrha once he sat down between her and a thankfully non—hugging Ruby. She looked nice in a snug red sweater and jeans – though it wouldn't really make sense to wear armor on a simple night on the town. And it seemed everyone else had realized as much, opting for more casual clothes than their usual eccentricities.

Thankfully for Jaune, he wasn't so complex. His combat clothes were his casuals.

"It is rare that you spend time with us – you are too busy all the time… with your training, I mean." The redhead spoke, idly twirling a lock of hair as she found other places to look other than at him.

Okay he deserved that, he could afford to be a little more attentive. He put his own needs over that of his team, a team that he was responsible for leading. If he only worked on himself and not the team, then what kind of leader would he be?

A failure. And Jaune was tired of being a failure.

"I'm sorry," He said genuinely, drawing her attention once more, "I wish I had a good excuse, but the best I have is I was being selfish lately…"

Do I not deserve to be, though? His mind betrayed.

The girl shook her head immediately, as though regretting her words. "No you haven't. Wanting to grow stronger as a person isn't selfish; we can all see that you are trying to be the best leader you can be."

"But I haven't been doing a good job lately, have I?"

She didn't answer, and that was enough for Jaune. Even when training to do better, he still found ways to mess things up. Here he was, thinking that an increase in his strength would improve both himself and his team… when really, he'd just sidelined them for things that shouldn't have been more important.

Some friend he was being…

"Well don't worry though," Ruby piped up from right next to him, "We have that Forever Fall trip in a few days; Goodwitch said it'll be a good activity to help build cooperation or whatever. All the first years do it."

Oh yeah, that was a thing wasn't it? He'd almost forgotten about it, too distracted by his own endeavors to be hype for a field trip.

"Indeed, it sounds quite exciting." Pyrrha agreed, sending a smile Jaune's way.

"Yeah, I guess it does… and if it's supposed to help teams get along better, then maybe that's what I need to be a better leader," He pumped his fist, sending his signature smile toward his partner, "I'm gonna do better Pyrrha, I promise."

"I will hold you to that, Jaune." Oh who was she kidding? Jaune already knew he'd won her over.

But that didn't meant what he said was empty.

He would ensure that the trip went well; and that he'd be a proper leader from then on. He'd keep up his training yes, but part of that would just have to include time with his team. Be it practice, eating meals, or just sitting in the dorm talking, Jaune would ensure that his team could rest assured knowing they had a good leader.

After all, to be a hero, it took more than just strength.

The Bullhead got set to take off into Vale, Jaune sucked in cold air from around him as this new resolve settled into his soul. Jaune Arc was a man of his word; always and forever, and nothing would keep him off this promise he made to those who had given a worthless being like himself the time of day.

With that he just sat back and allowed himself to get swept up in conversation, turning his head to a rambling Ruby before an odd feeling came to him.

Wait, for some reason this felt odd… was he forgetting something?

His stomach grumbled… violently. Liquids and solids in his belly beginning their upstream journey as Jaune immediately leapt out of his seat and dove for the garbage bin.

 _Aaand there goes breakfast._

* * *

 _ **~It Burns, Like Hunger~**_

* * *

"Can there be at least be one time where you don't get us kicked out of a store!?"

"Me!?"

Jaune wanted to shake his head, as the remaining party no doubt felt like doing as well. They should've predicted it the moment they walked into the shop – and maybe they did, so why do nothing? Maybe because they were all secretly lovers of mayhem and hid it well behind masks of good intent.

Or something.

Night had set in; the lights of the city visible in the distance as the group of eight made their way through the courtyard and to the dorms. They probably would have been back earlier, but then again, it's not like they had curfews at Beacon. Their scrolls functioned as their cards and keys to the dorms, so they were technically allowed to be out as late as they wanted.

By law they were all legal adults, bar Ruby – so even if they were at a school, they were still responsible for their actions.

Around them a few other students were returning from whatever they spent their days on; some talking about the latest party they came from, some perhaps coming back from some intense training. The dorms welcomed them all back, their chatter fading into suspended whispers out of consideration for those already asleep.

Ah quiet, it almost seemed foreign after a night like this.

Yang of course wanted to stay out longer; but any other place they could have gone were not, by her standards, age appropriate for Ruby. In that he was actually kind of glad Ruby had been there… no telling what Yang could have gotten the rest of them involved in.

But otherwise, he had to admit… he'd actually had fun.

Their rooms were in sight soon enough, the chatter amongst the rest of them fading away from Jaune's coherency as Ren reached their door first.

"Well, see you guys tomorrow!" Nora with her silly salute, following after her silent buddy as Ruby and her team crowed their good nights. Pyrrha was right behind her, giving team RWBY a nod and smile before disappearing behind the door as well. Yang, Blake and Weiss had since disappeared into their dorm, while only the leader remained at the slightly ajar door.

"Hey, Jaune?" Ruby was already half inside, but shortly before she closed the door behind herself she turned to face him again.

"Yeah?" He looked back at her.

"Um… I just wanted to say thank you. For coming."

"You don't really need to thank me for that…" In fact, he'd love it if she didn't, it would only stack an already high mountain of guilt.

"I know, but I wanted to… It means a lot when we get hang out together… uh, and everyone else too! All of us together! Not just two of us, haha, that'd be weird… right?"

It sounded more like an imploring question instead of a direct one; the reason plain and clear to him. But Jaune had not the patience to think on it further, instead opting to feed the flame.

"Weird, heck yeah…" he noted a slight shift in her nervous smile, almost downcast, "But, it'd be fun too."

"R-really?" She sounded shocked, like it was the very last thing she expected to hear from him.

"Why wouldn't it be?" He smirked with a raised eyebrow, resisting a chuckle as her cheeks tinted redder than her hood. The blonde pushed open his door, giving his young friend a tiny wave. "Good night, Ruby."

"Uh, y-yeah, good night!"

The door closed behind him and he sighed, looking over his teammates as they each got prepared for bed. Ren already gone from the world, long hair hanging over the side of his bed. Nora adjusting her blankets while Pyrrha brushed her hair in the bathroom. With a shrug, he hit his bed hard, hoping sleep would take him quickly.

"Did you have fun today, glorious leader!?" Crowed his bubbliest teammate.

"Sleeping, Nora."

"Okeydokey!"

But yes, he actually did. He didn't see himself regretting it – maybe it had started as nothing more than tolerance, but the night had been an enjoyable nonetheless. Seeing their smiles; hearing their laughs, being the one to incite those joyful reactions? He forgot how good it made him feel inside; how much he loved to make his friends happy.

Had he really lost sight of that?

It pained his heart to think he had; feeling like the worst kind of scum in the world. But today it stopped.

His friends were just as valuable as his dreams, and without their support, he would probably never achieve them anyway. He had to appreciate what he had and enjoy the time he could spend with them instead of being such a sour puss.

The lights went out as Pyrrha was the final one to her bed, only the moonlight peering through the window offered visibility, soon to be blotted out by the night clouds. Jaune paid her a tiny smile and she returned it as she pulled her comforter over herself. "Goodnight Jaune."

"Same to you, partner."

He felt his chest warm as her smile noticeably grew bigger, turning away from him to lay her head on her pillow, leaving all for him to look at a cascade of scarlet.

Jaune turned over in his bed… rubbing his feet together as he patiently waited for sleep to take him. A grateful smile stretched out on his features as he replayed the events of the night. Watching and laughing as Weiss and Yang fought over clothes; playing dozens of video games with Ruby, Nora and Yang… even teaching Pyrrha how to play some as well. Talking with Ren on the sidelines whenever it was just them…

It had all been worth it.

With a conscience now vividly clear, he fell asleep satisfied.

* * *

 _ **~It Burns, Like Hunger~**_

* * *

In the end, he couldn't resist.

His shirt was soaked in sweat and he felt sticky and disgusting, but even so, he left the arena happier than when he'd fallen asleep.

The halls lay dead silent; all Jaune hearing was the sound of the breath through his nose as he made his way back to the dorm. He'd sleep a little easier now; he'd only managed about two hours of practice before true exhaustion kicked in, but any amount of training was better than none.

It may not have been good for his body, but it managed to quell his soul so he wasn't complaining.

He hoped none of his teammates were awake – this would be incredibly awkward to explain away. It would take the happiness and joy of their hangout and shatter it to bits. That was the last thing he wanted…

But he didn't want to stop training either.

Oh what a conundrum…

Still, Jaune walked with purpose – though tired, he could go back to sleep knowing he put in as much work as he could find today. Tomorrow was Monday; and so would begin another week of fervent training to further increase his growing strength.

He couldn't wait.

With a little skip to his stride, Jaune hummed a tiny song to himself as he scanned his scroll over the dorm building entryway. Once it's data was taken in, the door unlocked and Jaune strode inside. Empty air welcomed him and Jaune began the rest of his journey back.

Until he started hearing laughs.

Probably just some other students; up late, possibly drunk from an irresponsible night. Nothing too unusual for the Beacon school grounds.

Except that wasn't it at all.

"Yo, what's up, Jauney-boy?"

Jaune simply stared at the bulky teen; resisting the urge to seethe as Cardin's cocky mug came into view. The lights built into the ceiling engrossing his form, and those of his teammates as the turned the corner to join up with him.

Really, of all people?

Why did he have to run into them, especially on a night like this? Where he hardly had the strength to so much as listen to them?

They didn't seem particularly hostile at the moment; though they were a far cry from tired. Surely they wouldn't try to pull anything funny in the dorms? Not when everyone was asleep and the possibility of them being heard was too high…

At least, that's what he hoped.

He'd just need to play it safe; keep calm. Just keep on as though his appearance didn't bother him in the slightest and that he was minding his own business. Perhaps the bully wouldn't have any incentive to bother him.

"Nothing you'd care about, Cardin. Just going back to my room."." Jaune shrugged one shoulder; keeping his heart cool as he walked up to move past them, watching them all carefully as he did so… They watched him as he moved past, which was more than a little creepy, but I seemed it worked. They were going to leave him be this time and go about their business…

Then, a single arm blocked his path.

"Now hold on there, that's a little cold, don't you think?" Chuckled the leader, burnt orange hair swaying as he sneered directly at Jaune, "Say, how about you chill with us for a bit, Jauney-boy? I don't see you around much anymore, I miss ya buddy."

No, you miss kicking my teeth in.

"Thanks, but no thanks," Jaune declined with a forced smile, "I'd prefer to be bright eyed and bushy tailed for class tomorrow. You know how Port is, fall asleep in his class and it's a fest of his tales in detention, right?" He tried to move past again.

And Cardin's arm didn't move.

"What do you say, Jaune?" Was Cardin really so much of an ass that he couldn't just leave him be for this one night? "Don't tell me mommy didn't teach you manners?"

Jaune again reigned in the urge to ball his hand into a fist. "Can you move your arm?"

"Close, but not good enough. Needs a little more persuasion, you know?"

Just do it… it's not worth getting upset over…

"Can you please move your arm?" He shouldn't have to beg this worm…

"Oh, sure man, why didn't you say so?" Cardin swung back his arm, gesturing down the hall as only a gentleman would. A genuine smile spread from cheek to cheek, Jaune eyed him for a second before moving forward…

His jaw crashing onto the floor a second later.

The four fell into raucous laughter, uncaring as to who could have heard them – Jaune needn't even look to know that Cardin had stuck his foot out to trip him.

"Ah geez man, you okay?" Cardin brushed down his shoulder plate, "That's karma for you though, maybe you'll remember that you should always say thank you when someone lets you move past them. Especially those who shouldn't have to. Sheesh, your parents didn't teach you a damn thing about respect."

Respect? Respect!? Who was this arrogant, fat-headed piece of shit to say that!? It burned Jaune inside to hear it, knowing he couldn't do anything. With as much grace as he could, he got up, arms shaking with anger and legs quivering with… fear?

Only to be kicked down again, followed by more laughter.

Why was he taking this? Why was he allowing it to happen? The scum of the earth was laughing like hyenas while he was on his hands and knees like some worthless peasant. They stood above him; stronger, smarter, better in every way. And he, the hopeless inferior… forever to bow at the feet and lick the carpeted flooring.

And to top it all off… he was scared.

"Tell you what Jauney-boy," Cardin dragged him up from the floor, his back now pushed against the wall as the bigger boy smirked, "you fight me, just me. Right here and now, no weapons, no tricks, no semblances. If you win, you can go on your merry way. But if I win…" his grin widened, if that was even possible, "well, let's just say you really don't want me to win."

It was tempting, truly it was.

In that moment Jaune wanted nothing more than to beat Cardin down with his bare fists; to strike fear in the hearts of his teammates as they watched their leader go down. He wanted Cardin to hurt, badly – and his heart was beating so fast he thought he just about to lose control and attack.

But he couldn't… he wasn't ready.

He was too tired; and even if he was fully awake, he still doubted he could win. He wasn't yet confident enough to think he was ready to face the mace wielder. Right now, he certainly wasn't brave enough.

"I'm… I'm not g-going to play your stupid game Cardin," Damn his stutter, "Just leave me alone, I'm just trying to go to bed."

The teen was silent for second, fist slowly unfurling the collar of his shirt as he let him go. His grin faded into a bored frown. "You're right, my bad. Go on, Jauney-boy."

Just like that?

Jaune stared at him almost incredulously, and for the first time he wasn't wearing his sneer. Was he seriously just going to let him go? Had he grown bored of this little confrontation? Well that was good news for Jaune so long as it was true. Testing him, he took two steps away, looking at Dove, Russel and Sky and seeing that they had cleared a path for him as well.

"Hurry up idiot, before I change my mind." Cardin commanded. A bit of wounded pride, but Jaune would follow that order candidly.

He straightened himself up before making his way down the hall…

A strike in the back of the head sending him crashing against the wall.

The vicious bully laughed, hands grabbed his arms and held him in place as fists pummeled against his face and stomach. A solid blow to his jaw, dislodging a single tooth and allowing the metallic taste of blood to fill up his mouth. "You fucking idiot! You really think I'd let a whining, crying little pussy like you get away? No, not without teaching you where your place is!"

His hits… he couldn't even count them, trying his hardest to break free of the grip of three far stronger students and fighting the pain of every strike. Cardin fist came crashing into his stomach, forcing air and blood out of him. Then the opposite knuckle came, crashing into his left cheek and eye and leaving a splitting headache there.

"You don't get to act all high and mighty to me, you got that? I'm the top dog in this school, and you are nothing but the scraps of trash the janitors clean up!"

No, he couldn't be… he refused to be…

"The hell could that Ozpin be thinking, letting a loser like you come to a place for the elite? What, you think cuz your name is Arc that you're just better than everyone else?"

No, never… it was because he was an Arc that he wanted to be strong. Not the strongest, just strong enough to have relevance. Was that so wrong?

He laughed and taunted as Jaune felt the blows, hard knuckles against a jaw and body no longer protected by aura. Soon enough his cohorts had let him go, joining in stomping him into the floor and kicking him where it hurt. His face, chest, stomach, groin… no part of him was spared.

Why… why couldn't he fight back?

"Ha! Look at 'em, he's cryin' like a baby! Just like that little rabbit cunt!" Dove hollered.

"He ain't shit, Arc my ass. Betcha his parents disowned him or something." Russel added, along with two kicks to his face.

Jaune tried to fight back, he tried so hard… but instead found himself growing weaker and weaker by the second. His one open eye found Cardin's, terror igniting his heart as he saw his cruel smile in between punches to his face.

Had they not had enough? He was done, defeated… he could do nothing to them. But of course, they were looking for victory…

They were looking to hurt him, simply that. To make him feel like less than he deserved. And they were succeeding.

It went on for who knows how long – To him it may as well have been hours, arms lying on the floor as he lay on his side. He could feel the blood leaking out of his busted lip and nose, one eye completely swollen as the other struggled to stay aware. His stomach clenched and coiled with each added blow, the front of his pants now warm and damp.

"Ugh, nasty, he pissed himself! What a fucking baby!" Who was it that said it? He couldn't really tell anymore…

Just then a hand grabbed his hair, hoisting his head back to look into the face of the owner. His tears obscured his vision, but he knew without a doubt it was Cardin. "Remember this Arc: You're trash, and you always will be!"

One final blow to his jaw, sending him back onto the floor again.

"Ah," Cardin stretched his arms, "Nothing like a good chat between pals eh Jauney-boy? By the way, you know that homework Oobleck assigned for us? We're gonna needs the answers to those before his class; actually all of us need them, don't we guys?"

"Hell yeah we do."

"Good, cuz Jaune here is gonna help us out. He's a real pal like that. And you know what, if you can just keep doing our assignments for us, we may even be nice and be a little gentler on you next time, sound fair?"

Jaune could offer no response, other than swallowing the blood and mucus that swam down his throat.

"Great," The bully laughed again, "We're gonna get outta your hair – got a lot of work ahead of you, and you're gonna need a good night's sleep to handle it all. Be seeing ya, Arc."

And then they were gone, their laughter and comments about him being the only things Jaune could last remember of them.

He just laid there… unmoving. Not because he couldn't, but because he didn't know if he wanted to.

His one open eye looked at his hands; hands that worked and fought for days on end. How many calluses had Jaune cleaned off, how many cuts had he bandaged up? How many times had he fallen and hit the ground hard, only to tell himself to never give up and stand again?

So many times… too many times.

He'd should have known it would be fruitless. Who was he kidding? He'd trained this long and still had gotten nowhere… Cardin took him out, just like he always did. No matter how much Jaune tried, he would never beat him… and if he couldn't beat Cardin Winchester, then he'd never beat anyone.

Weak. That's what he was.

Weak, pathetic, sad, and scared. And that was all he'd ever be.

His lip quivered with this horrid realization; his swollen eye stinging with each tear that squeezed out of it, his other eye flowed like a river, mixing with the blood that oozed out of his nose and stained his jacket.

A single fist weakly pounded the floor, not even strong enough to leave an echo in the dark and empty halls.

 _Damn it… just… damn it all…_

* * *

 **So that was some shit. Hella dark.**

 **Not much to say here except that I'm sorry for not uploading in a while, but I finally got around to it. At first the drop where things turn around for Jaune happened in chapter six, but after reviewing the original, I've moved it to chapter 4. From this point on the execution will change quite a bit but not the original storyline, that will stay the same.**

 **One of my biggest weaknesses is doing a lot of unnecessary setup. An issue I am still working on and hope to improve in this rewrite.**

 **This is the lowest point Jaune reaches so I'm thinking this is a good place for things to get started. But maybe I'm wrong, what do ya'll think?**

 **So with this chapter you might assume some things about Ruby in regards to Jaune, but I shall not say anything, thats for you all to interpret.**

 **Thanks for reading and until next time!**


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